Tuesday, March 09, 2004
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LINE UP HERE, BOYS!
Time to jump on the bandwagon with my own list of Must-Haves and Deal-Breakers.
Must Have
1. Teeth. I like perfectly straight, very white teeth.
2. Hair. My hair has no natural curl at all, so I have to have a mate with some natural curl, preferably a nice dark brown, and no thinning. (I’ll need to see his father and maternal uncles, of course, to check for baldness.)
3. He should keep himself in perfect condition. I’m not picky about specifics, as long as he falls between 5’11” and 6’1” and can bench press 300 pounds.
4. Must have green thumb to plant annual garden according to my specifications
5. Must be able to name all the women Michael slept with on “Melrose Place”
6. Must play the piano competently (Rhapsody in Blue is test piece)
7. Be able to prepare a perfect omelet (and will do so on demand)
8. Be able to dance ballroom, swing, Latin, and electric slide without embarrassing me
9. Worships the ground I walk on. Thinks I'm the most gorgeous woman in the world. (Lies, tell me lies.)
10. Enjoys waiting on me hand and foot. Lives to meet my every need.
Deal Breakers
1. Snores
2. Watches sports on TV (this taboo waived when my mother is visiting us)
3. Wears more jewelry than I do
4. Slurps his soup
5. Puts ketchup on hot dogs
6. Subscribes to any magazine featuring nude women or an annual swimsuit issue
7. Has holes in socks (or in Hawaii, wears socks - where they are not worn)
8. Questions my political or social views
9. Thinks Harlequin is a snake
10. Doesn't watch A&E
Time to jump on the bandwagon with my own list of Must-Haves and Deal-Breakers.
Must Have
1. Teeth. I like perfectly straight, very white teeth.
2. Hair. My hair has no natural curl at all, so I have to have a mate with some natural curl, preferably a nice dark brown, and no thinning. (I’ll need to see his father and maternal uncles, of course, to check for baldness.)
3. He should keep himself in perfect condition. I’m not picky about specifics, as long as he falls between 5’11” and 6’1” and can bench press 300 pounds.
4. Must have green thumb to plant annual garden according to my specifications
5. Must be able to name all the women Michael slept with on “Melrose Place”
6. Must play the piano competently (Rhapsody in Blue is test piece)
7. Be able to prepare a perfect omelet (and will do so on demand)
8. Be able to dance ballroom, swing, Latin, and electric slide without embarrassing me
9. Worships the ground I walk on. Thinks I'm the most gorgeous woman in the world. (Lies, tell me lies.)
10. Enjoys waiting on me hand and foot. Lives to meet my every need.
Deal Breakers
1. Snores
2. Watches sports on TV (this taboo waived when my mother is visiting us)
3. Wears more jewelry than I do
4. Slurps his soup
5. Puts ketchup on hot dogs
6. Subscribes to any magazine featuring nude women or an annual swimsuit issue
7. Has holes in socks (or in Hawaii, wears socks - where they are not worn)
8. Questions my political or social views
9. Thinks Harlequin is a snake
10. Doesn't watch A&E
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